Haven't been on for a while; my apologies. Just had life to deal with and catch up on. So, let's start with some updates, shall we?

First off, because it is first in my mind, I have an orthodontic appliance now that makes my mouth hurt. It's going to do three things--erupt my bottom molars, pull my bottom jaw forward, and widen my palette. What sucks is NONE of my teeth come together, so eating is a right trip. And talking is fun too. It's this big hardened acrylic HUNK in my mouth, top and bottom, giving me a sort of lisp or something. It's fun, gotta say. Had it less than a week now. Pluses though--I don't drool. I don't sound as bad as expected. It's stopped hurting as bad.

Next up, I'm going on a cruise soon. I'm off of work today and tomorrow (Tuesday and Wednesday) then I work on Thursday 4p-11p. Then, on Friday, I go up to NYC to meet family and then Saturday is the cruise. It's Carnival and I'm going up to Canada. It's for my Bub and Pop's fiftieth anniversary. The entire time I'll be on the cruise, I will not have the following::cell service, internet. That means, I'll be outta contact with all my beloveds. Oh de wells. I'll survive. lol.

What drama am I dealing with of late? A confusion that has been sorted out thanks to the help of Berto (he's still on hiatus, but I talk to him elsewhere). I'm not trying again because something feels off, even if pretty pictures have been painted. I'm desperate, but I refuse to bring my desperate feelings into a relationship that has failed once and will likely not last.... Apologies, but I'm not going to force feelings that have already faded. Something has changed, and I question whether I like that change or not....

I got my roommate for college. She's pretty (seen pics of her on Facebook), but I don't know if it'll be a good match.... Her profile says she's Catholic, so we'll see how that goes considering my sexuality and all. I refuse to be closeted in college... She also like to "party and have a good time." She has pictures of her drinking beer and stuff... And she's about a year younger than me. Dunno. But, we'll have to see. Maybe it'll be okay and she'll be fun and nice and we'll become friends...

Eh, might as well just admit that I've been blah a lot more lately. Well, actually worse than blah. Numb. Empty. Low. A mix of loneliness, of stress, of just general "I hate my life" feelings. Temptation has been calling loudly lately... Words have been flowing freely, in a way, but a good bit cannot be posted for various reasons. It's my coping, not the business of all; no offense meant. I've just been having to get bad thoughts out and sort through confusion. Dealing. Coping. Accepting.

Don't think there's really anything else to say. Just felt like updating any and all about random stuff. Blahness. Lurvels!

Luna